The Republican Facebook Pages Are EVEN BETTER

I think you have to be signed up to read all this crap, so here’s a taste.I think this might be my favorite comment on John McCain’s:

I just want to state for the record, that regardless of whether or not McCain wins the presidency, he is always going to be a winner in my heart because he is an American patriot and has a very hot wife.

Then there’sMike Huckabee’s page which is just so great:

Question…does anyone know where/ if I can find a Mike Huckabee baby onesie? If you don’t have one, I recommend it. I know a lot of babies that would look good in a Mike Huckabee onesie.

Instead of “What can brown do for you?” It is “What can Mike do for you?”

I truly wish I had billions of dollars to promote you, but I don’t, so I Pray to God that you make it someway or another.

You will, you will Huck us !!! [with the tune of “we will rock you”]

Mr. A was taking a nap on the couch here next to me, and I just laughed so hard I scared him awake, no kidding. He looked up at me, I said, “Republican Facebook,” and he shook his head and went back to snoring.

You can count on 100 percent of my vote!!

Because … can you do it in percentages now? Could I have given 98 percent of my vote to Dodd and the other 2 to Richardson or something? You fuckers, WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME ABOUT THIS?

With prayer outlawed in school, a growing tolerance for anything and everything (except evangelical Christianity), our nation is running blindly like lost sheep toward the edge of the cliff! We need The Shepherd to save us from an almost certain fall. The people must pray for God’s intervention or we’ll have a blind leader, leading the blind! Mike, we need a leader who follows the lead of The Good Shepherd! I trust that’s your aim.

Every day in my prayers I thank God for the Internet.


9 thoughts on “The Republican Facebook Pages Are EVEN BETTER

  1. But where can I get disposable diapers, with John McCain’s face printed on the inside?
    Oh wait, I think I’ve found the mother lode of all senator+diaper goodness:
    Just make sure to specify that you want “UN-used” ones.

  2. The last time I saw the shepherd he was chasing the neighbors Dalmation down the street – but I’m sure he will be happy to come back if we get too close to the edge of that cliff. Come back Lassie!!

  3. Your reaction to this may eventually be like mine to the Darwin Awards. The first few are stupid and funny (“ha, those idiots, taking a water tower apart from the bottom to steal the metal”) but sooner or later all the stupidity and death just gets depressing, and I have to quit.
    On the other hand, you can imagine the Darwin awardees actually accepting advice, if it were offered, that would save them from themselves (“hey guys, why not start at the top, so it won’t fall on you?”) but I get the impression that Republican Myspace is not interested in helpful hints or other points of view.

  4. Do sheep really walk off cliffs without a shepherd? I thought that was lemmings. I think I’ll pray for more knowledge of behavioral zoology and then share any answers I get with the class.

  5. A – Did you ever read Deadwood by Pete Dexter? You’d like it. You’d like The Paperboy even more. It’s about teh newspapers.

  6. joejoejoe, you said what I was thinking! 🙂 Who’s raising sheep in dangerous cliff zones!?!? Granted all of the self-proclaimed persecuted xtian evangelicals could go dropping off of the cliffs and I wouldn’t be upset except for who’s pulling clean up duty!

  7. Did anyone else notice that the big picture of Huckabee in front of a gigantic american flag with the Huck in blue jeans and jacket, like a country western star?
    In the picture, it doesn’t appear that the Huckster, in his own self-selected picture, isn’t wearing an American Flag lapel pin. Why won’t he wear an American Flag lapel pin?

  8. Oh no, McCain’s facebook photo is him in a business suit leaning against a column. Again, I don’t see a lapel pin (and I don’t see any flag, anywhere).
    Why does McCain hate america?

  9. Joejoejoe, lemmings don’t even do that. Just 20%-deadender Republicans.
    I wish these people weren’t quite so stupid or susceptible to the noise machine’s frames — did any of you notice that prayer isnot outlawed in any US school (or any Canadian school, for that matter, dammit). You can pray all you like — most people do, usually right around final exams (the atheists in the crowd are either cramming or making crib notes). You just can’thave the school endorse your particular religious flavour of the month. (Knowing the kind of religious types I went to high school with, it reallywas the flavour of the month. You could change your religion more often than your underwear around there, as long as you stuck to some or other flavour of Christianity, and that was cool with the in-crowd.)
    The most scary thing about these people is that they do, in fact, vote.

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