The Hip New Phrase That’s Sweeping The Nation!*

Sweet baby jesus with carmelized apple sections.

I went looking for this interview because as a fangirl, I wanted to see whatHeather sounded like in real life. As I watched, though (and envied her haircut), I was overwhelmed with fury and despair at the absolute bottom-feeding shit journalism I was witnessing, and don’t talk me down by saying this was a talk show for ladies who eat bonbons in the daytime or some shit, I am embarrassed for the entire medium, no, forget it, for the species, by the question of “Who is on your blogosphere?” Because … WHAT? What is that? Simultaneously, where does the host/presenter/news twink to the right get off with her, “I think you’re very pretty but you SUCK” sermon at the end there?

The story has it all: Stupid, condescending attitude toward women? Check. Stupid, condescending attitude toward mothers? Check. Something common being characterized as revelatory because somebody just discovered it? FUCKING CHECK. God, I hate my life a little because it now includes having heard someone (an orange someone, with scary hair) describe her reluctance to understand a particular communications medium as afear of computers.

And like I said, I get that this is a fluffy morning show. But, someone pays these people, and someone pays the people who tell them things, and SOMEBODY shouldn’t be drawing a paycheck this week, is all I’m saying. The shit we let live TV get away with is staggering. You’re gonna do a story about something, you’re gonna interview someone about what she does, least you can do is LEARN ITS FUCKING NAME.

A.

*Title stolen from a Wisconsin State Journal feature article, published I think during my senior year of college, about the expression “WHOOMP THERE IT IS!” I graduated in 1996, just so we’re clear.

14 thoughts on “The Hip New Phrase That’s Sweeping The Nation!*

  1. (Mostly off topic, except as to the un-hipness of newspapers…)
    Upon having lost a fight to Muhammad Ali and announcing his retirement from boxing, the Appleton Post-Crescent ran an article which, to the best of my recollection, contained the following:
    Asked what he would do with his retirement, [Joe] Frazier responded “I’m gonna boogie, boogie, boogie.” [ed note: It means to have a good time.]

  2. Ok, I get why Heather didn’t, but it would have been so absolutely *righteous* if she’d either popped that twit, or mocked her for the “who is on your blogosphere” or asked for someone who WASN’T askeered of the those new-fangeled computer type thingies.
    A, ditto what you said. That just plain sucked. And Heather deserves better.

  3. my cringe response has completely exhausted itself.
    JESUS! When worlds collide.
    That – verbatim- could have been out of Christopher Guest movie.
    The awful irony is that Kathy Lee Gifford (she’s the older twit) has made a career out of herself and her family-some would say she’s an icon, or at least a has been icon, maybe. And there are women out there (I don’t know any but I know they are there) who admire her, and see her as role model. But she’s a fucking millionaire celebrity so out of touch with the real world that she doesn’t even understand what a blog, or for that matter, the internet, is! (Like some of the pundits- you know they’ve probably not gotten further than opening their AOL email).
    And Heather, however much she and her husband are making off Dooce, is still a real person. The people who frequent her blog get something real from it- there is a real reciprocal relationship (not face to face, but real nonethless). She’s reached out and has been reached out to. ie, she’s a human being, and likely will be, even with a book and movie deal.
    But the plastic celebrity from the other planet gets the last word, and it probably held in greater esteem by more people.
    oy

  4. Virgo, that was KATHIE LEE? Jesus, I didn’t even recognize her, and I used to watch her show all the time with my grandmother.
    She’s tangerine. Maybe that’s why.
    A.

  5. You know the other thing? Heather has made this successful because she can *write.* Really, really well. In an engaging manner that makes you come back for more.
    They’re all amazed she would post pictures of her kid and talk about potty training. That’s not the amazing part, you twits.
    The amazing part is that she has made that CONNECTION Virgo is talking about, so that people come back to *read* about the potty training. I mean, really people. Potty training. And she puts things on her dog’s head.
    That didn’t happen by accident, or because people have no where else to go, it’s because Heather brings something to the page that brings them back. Can we celebrate that, instead of tut tutting her for endangering her kid – and not letting her make her point in response to that because, what, it’s all about you?
    I really hope she gets increased traffic as a result of it, and her ad rates go up, blah blah blah cuz she deserves something positive to come out of putting up with that horror.

  6. Great posts everyone. The first part is the part that made me cringe. I remember the bumpers sticker. ‘If you are in marketing, kill yourself.”
    Yes, products need to be sold. Yes we need to figure out ways to sell stuff to people. No I don’t hate money, but I’m so sick and tired of the MONEY being the whole be all and end all of the work.
    As was pointed out above, Heather can WRITE. And she is funny and she connects and makes people want more. That is a real skill. And the people who are trying to sell to the people who read the blogs have figured it out. JUST LIKE THE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO SELL TO THE PEOPLE WHO WATCH TV!
    The cluelessness on the TV shows and the attitude they have toward the bloggers is the kind of attitude we see from newspapers. “How dare they write! They aren’t trained!” The TV people of course have the same stuff. “We are TV people we are famous for our wit and humor and ability to attract audiences with stupid stuff. That is our gig.” They of course won’t be criticized. Why? Because people want to be on TV!
    I think about book writing. Who does interviews on political books? On the right they have all of talk radio, think tanks, right-wing cable shows and also all the websites and subsidized crap newspapers (I’m looking at you Washington “loses 30 million a year” Times.
    If WE have a book we have to compete with REAL books and SERIOUS stuff. I can’t just have an attitude and get coverage. I can’t criticize the media and get on any shows. The right wing won’t put on a left wing person criticizing them. The SCLM won’t put on a person criticizing them. (See Adrianne’s book, See Eric Boehlert’s book)s They will only put on a book criticizing the LEFT. )
    The TV shows HAVE to mock bloggers and do stories like “What are these words and photos on screens?” They know their audience. And it’s sad. One part of the audience is people like us who watch it for something to mock and some people watch because it is the only place that we can see some of people we WANT to see.
    If I ever get on TV do I spend my time criticizing the TV? No. Because that is my one shot and I have to get my messages on. On the other hand I turned DOWN two chances to be on TV because I didn’t to reveal who I was. The CNN producer thought I was nuts, but I like to think that it will make me more mysterious.

  7. ‘If you are in marketing, kill yourself.”
    Quote is from the late comedian (and prophet) Bill Hicks.

  8. video not available for me. who? i must say i laughed at her web site. i swear teevee’s persons are getting stupider by the minute. i reFUSE to watch morning teevee. it is STOOPID STOOPID STOOPID STOOPID and will make you stupid too.

  9. “*Title stolen from a Wisconsin State Journal feature article, published I think during my senior year of college, about the expression ‘WHOOMP THERE IT IS!’ I graduated in 1996, just so we’re clear.”
    Oh, crud. I graduated in ’95. I need to get cracking on a book ASAP. I am officially ancient.

  10. Oh, and it is a sad, sad clip for me personally because Hoda Kotb, siiting next to Tangerine Kathie Lee, was once a promising investigative reporter here in New Orleans, and then she moved on to Dateline…but now she’s the sidekick to the woman who launched a thousand sweatshops?
    Somebody shoot me.

  11. Who is on your blogosphere?!!! I need to know why those two gals, Hoda and Kathie, want to put themselves “out there” on the tee vee. Basically, they have nothing to offer.
    Liprap is correct. Hoda Gotb was, at one time, a good investigative reporter. It’s a sad comedown. Sometimes I wonder if blogging is like geometry. You either get it, or you don’t. It seem there’s no explaining it to some folks.

  12. Was it the question or the tone of “Who is on you blogosphere?” that bothered you? It is so obvious that these women, especially Kathie Lee, have no concept of the internet and blogging and used this interview to exert their dominance as “real, working women.” Dooce is more relevant.
    In all honesty, I find them and most mommybloggers and most bloggers, me included, quite lame. Feh.

  13. Clarification of somewhat sleepy, mostly cranky Maitri above:
    1) Blogging is ground-breaking yet self-indulgent enough eveb when it is done well that there is no need for poorly-written “I ate pizza today,” “my baby’s poo is brown” and “today, I weigh 162 pounds” posts that I read around the internet, from mommies and others. Dooce, Liprap and some others write so well that I would read them even if they weren’t mommies.
    2) The medium doesn’t matter, the quality of the material does. Kathie Lee sucks, First Draft rocks, Bill Moyers rocks and some other blogs suck.
    That is all.

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