It’s been a painful week at Adrastos World HQ. I had a game leg last week, which led to my walking awkwardly, which led to lower back pain. Getting old is not for the faint of heart. It beats the hell outta the alternative.
How was that for a short and punchy introduction or is it a foreword? Discuss amongst yourselves.
This week we have a two-headed theme song with cloudy songs by the Temptations and George Harrison.
The Temptations’ Cloud Nine was written in 1968 by Norman Whitfield and Barrett Strong.
George Harrison’s Cloud Nine was written by the former Beatle in 1987. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The forecast is for cloudy skies.
The forecast remains cloudy. Let’s give in and enjoy it:
How can I top Stephane and Django? In a word: Impossible.
We begin our second act with a story out of New Orleans.
The NOLA Car-Crash Conspiracy: My state and city are known for chicanery. There’s a swell piece in The New Yorker by Patrick Radden Keefe about sleazy lawyers and their slammers. A slammer is someone who deliberately causes a car crash so they can sue. Don’t slam me, slam them.
The car-crash conspiracy involved a small time lawyer, not one of the major billboard lawyers in New Orleans. Vanessa Mott’s office was in a nondescript office in suburban Kenner of all places. That’s right, Kenna brah.
For the twists and turns of this fraud and its resolution, get thee to The New Yorker.
Neil Young sings us out of this segment about ambulance chasers:
Hollywood Movie Bloat: I’m on the record as believing that the ideal movie length is 90 minutes. I’m down with the odd 2 hour flick but movies keep getting longer, especially ones designed as Oscar bait. Is Paul Thomas Anderson even capable of releasing a movie that’s under 150 minutes? That was a rhetorical question. His idea of a short and snappy movie runs at least 135 minutes. Oy, just oy.
That brings me to a scintillating NYT column by Frank Bruni who researched the movie length issue:
The film data researcher Stephen Follows recently analyzed the running times of 36,431 movies released between 1980 and 2025. He concluded that in the 1980s, about 14 percent of wide theatrical releases — movies that open on hundreds or even thousands of screens across North America — ran over two hours. “In the 2020s,” he wrote, “it’s 32 percent.” And the wider the movie’s release and the bigger its budget, the longer it tends to be.”
It makes me nostalgic for the heyday of Roger Corman, the King of the B Movies. Low budgets can set you free.
The last word of our second act goes to The Kinks:
We begin our third act with our favorite stolen feature.
Separated At Birth Casting Edition: Isa Briones plays the snarky and sardonic Dr. Santos on The Pitt. Naturally, she’s one of my favorite characters. The season-2 finale concluded with her engaging in some karaoke therapy, which she does IRL as well.
Unlike most practitioners of the karaoke arts, Briones can sing. In fact, she played singer Connie Francis on Broadway.
I’ll let Connie sing us out of this segment:
Your Basic Basie: I still have weather on my mind. Here’s a breezy instrumental from Bill Basie and the boys.
Have I told you lately how much I love Count Basie?
The Best Of Jack Benny: Remember the William Safire pun I quoted the other day: Yamani or ya life? It was inspired by this sketch featuring Jack Benny and the voice of Looney Tunes, Mel Blanc.
Jack should have done this:
Classic Movie Trailer: This week, a contender for the greatest film ever made and the subject of a 2016 Adrastos post called Charles Foster Kane Meets Donald Trump. Poor Kane.
Grading Time: I give Citizen Kane 4 stars and an Adrastos grade of A. It’s a stone cold classic the crappy tagline notwithstanding: It’s terrific. Was that they best they could do? Oy, just oy.
Saturday GIF Horse: Speaking of terrific, see Orson clap. Clap, Orson, clap.
Orson isn’t the only one who likes to clap. So does Steve Howe:
Toon Time: Pat Bagley pays a return visit to this space with a toon entitled Loaded Kash.
Repeat after me: Party on, Kash.
Let’s close down this virtual honky tonk with some more music.
Saturday Classic: I woke up with this Bowie classic in my ear the other day. The only way to expel an earworm is by sharing it under the serious moonlight or some such shit.
That’s all for this week. The last word goes to the closing credits of Citizen Kane instead of a bat meme. I like to keep my readers off balance.
