Protecting Your Safety and Property

Department of That Didn’t Take Long, Subset of Where Have I Heard This Before?

The hip new talking point sweeping the conservative blog brain trust is that Obama supporters gathering in Grant Park in Chicago are planning to riot, loot, burn, dance, possibly play rap music, and in some cases display “bling.”

It’ll be Obamapandemonium!

“As I live in the Chicago Area, I’m ‘hunkering down’ for the riots that are sure to ensure — whether or not Obama wins or loses,” says NoBamaNation. “If Obama Loses the Left Will Riot,” says Ray Thomas. “Vote Obama, because if you don’t blacks will riot,” says Drew D. “I guess I can now be called racist.” “I want more than anything to watch them fall in the midst of the Obama Victory Celebration Obama Pity Riot,” says Political Republican Opinion. “Obama and his supporters are showing as much political civility as the citizens of Paris prior to the Bastille,” says The Council of Conservative Citizens, calling for their readers to “stop our recession into a dark and ugly future,” presumably by any means necessary.

In fact, if Obama wins OR loses, conservatives are gonna wanna prepare themselves well.Debbie Schlussel wants you to buy a gun:

If you’re not supporting Barack Hussein Obama and don’t own a personal protection mechanism, now might be the time to acquire one. Even if he does win as predicted, methinks there will be a lot more violence…

The Jawa Report (you, out of my pop culture!) suggests you buytwo guns:

I expect riots. I’m not joking.

Right now the odds of McCain winning seem something like 3:2 — still within the realm of possibility, although the safe bet is on Obama. If you’re in a major urban area and don’t have a gun, you’re a fool. The Left is so confident about Obama winning, and so paranoid about the man keeping them down, that the only possible explanation for a loss in their minds is going to be election fraud.

I was a Boy Scout: Be Prepared.

Jawa cites something calledSmall Dead Animals which, along with addressing your roadkill needs, warns of the simmering rage of the left:

If the Obamessiah should lose, the rage that will erupt on the left towards McCain will make the last 8 years of Bush hatred seem like a vague distaste for cream sauce.

No word on the stockpiling of canned goods, but I’m sure good conservatives already have a well-stocked wilderness bunker and/or duck blind with all these things in abundance.

And it all sounds so familiar. I was struggling to place it when, driving home, I heard NPR in a sort of retrospective playing George Wallace’s campaign ads.



5 thoughts on “Protecting Your Safety and Property

  1. So what are the odds that some brave college republicans dressed in hoodies, bling and masks start a riot? I’m sure that the wanna be Karl Roves could pull it off.

  2. “Right now the odds of McCain winning seem something like 3:2…”
    Could you please search out this person’s home address for me? Because I have a car, a couple IRAs, a 401K, a checking account and an eTrade account that I’d like to wager with him. Heck, I’ll even go ‘all the way’ to 3-to-1 odds.
    3-to-2 odds. What planet are these people living on?

  3. 3:2?
    Really? 50:1 and 3:2 are now equivalent?
    Also, 3:2 is way, way more than “in the realm of possibility.” A 40% shot? Not long odds at all.
    This is why these fuckheads have such a hard time understanding polling data.
    Statistical FAIL.

  4. As usual the white men are trying to cook up an excuse to get together and roam the streets beating up random strangers. They have been doing that for hundreds of years, here in the US. I am beginning to think we need to consider a white man curfew. Sundown, maybe.

  5. The reality is that if Obama can pull this off, tomorrow the rightards will be out in force, rioting, looting and killing, because they believe it’s their god-given right to control everything.

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