Throwback or Throw Up Uniforms?

I was waiting for 60 Minutes to come on last night on I saw the tail end of the Broncos-Patriots game and the ugliest sports uniform since the days of double knit polyester in MLB: the circa 1960 Denver Broncos retro uniform. In the picture below, Broncos QB Kyle Orton celebrates both victory and the fact that he’ll never have to wear that much brown and yellow ever again:

Woo hoo, let's change duds/

Thatthrow up throwback uniform is a vivid illustration as to why I never wear brown. I mentioned horrible baseball uniforms of the past. Here are the ones I had in mind. They’re so ugly even Tim Gunn couldn’t make them work:

pads_unisUniformAstros

Cross-posted at Adrastos.

19 thoughts on “Throwback or Throw Up Uniforms?

  1. virgotex says:

    The leggings are very Malvolio-esque

  2. liprap says:

    That was the Broncos playing? And I thought it was the Steelers. The colors are too similar seen on a teevee across a crowded restaurant…
    I think next week Lady Gaga ought to design their uniforms. It’d be much more fun seeing those guys running around with this on:
    http://tonywilliamsmusic.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/0319gaga.jpg

  3. Athenae says:

    Smexy.
    A.

  4. Elspeth R says:

    Heyyyy!!! Those vintage Astros uni’s are sacred. Noone messes w/J.R. and Nolan – that was back when baseball was a fun and affordable event and the players generally had other jobs in the off-season (in other words, they were a bit more grounded in reality) and then there was that strike to get megabucks and I haven’t paid to see (and have actually turned down tix) an Astros game since. At least they weren’t Double-knit brown and dried mustard yellow.
    Elspeth

  5. leinie says:

    Those were bad, weren’t they? I called my mother, the avid Broncos fan, to ask what the nation did to deserve THAT. Dad was certain they were on the wrong channel, no way that could be the Broncos. When he realized it was, his response? “What the hell are they wearing?”

  6. BuggyQ says:

    Oh, for heaven’s sake, the vertical striped socks have been a part of Broncos legend forever. I can’t say I’m thrilled about them being brought back in a color TV era, but they are part of our history.
    And note, for the record, that in spite of those godawful uniforms, my beloved Broncos are currently 5 – 0. That’s FIVE and OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!

  7. Adrastos says:

    I dunno, Elspeth, the ‘stros unis may have been cursed: the last I heard JR was homeless and Nolan is a rabid Gooper. Only one of those conditions is curable…

  8. CybScryb says:

    I grew up on AFL football in the ’60’s and must confess that the McDonald’s uni’s the Bronco’s were wearing were new to me. I’m guessing they were the same vintage as the Chiefs first season uniforms worn to play the Cowboys yesterday.
    But #10 of the Bronco’s did something really cool. We twisted those vertically striped hose and looked for all the world like something from Willy Wonka running and jumping out there.
    I like the retro uni’s of the Chargers and Patriots. The Jets, Bronco’s and Steeler’s, not so much. But it’s fun for the sake of memories and if one of the ref’s would stop and deliver a Good Humor ice cream to one of the head coaches, I think we might be well on our way to national mood rehabilitation.

  9. liprap says:

    And what’s happened to Mike Scott since then, Els?
    The colored unis, much as I got a kick out of ’em personally, needed to go the way of Chester Charge. Just sayin’…
    And A, I guess it musta been Ryan’s time with the Rangers that really put him over the gooper edge once and for all.

  10. Interrobang says:

    Football players inLandsknecht socks. Who’d’a thunk?

  11. pansypoo says:

    i like the socks.

  12. Elspeth R says:

    Lip, dunno, my aunt had a crush on him. I was a Bill Doran gal myself.

  13. liprap says:

    Craig Biggio has always been my ‘Stros guy, even when I became a Mets fan in ’86. I really wanted the Astros to win the World Series just for him, as Biggio’s been around for a long time. Oh, well.

  14. ...now I try to be amused says:

    “Craig Biggio has always been my ‘Stros guy…”
    Yeah. Any player who sets the career record for being hit by pitches is hardcore.

  15. MapleStreet says:

    I have to admit that I’m having enough problems trying to decipher the team names for teams that have moved around since I followed sports. (For Example, even though I am in Missouri, I most emphatically note that the RAMS are from Los Angeles – and even St. Louis will kick out this loosing team if Limbaugh persists).
    Think of what is to come: The Miami Blizzards? The Fargo Heat?

  16. gailadizon says:

    capita apple company simulate warm retrieved sun

  17. waleiswash says:

    substantial seasonal societies figure vectors extinctions surface without

  18. When they became overpaid fools w/occassional talent, I tuned out. The strike destroyed the ‘work for it, cause you love it’ vibe and they became a bunch of brats.
    If I knew I could strike to get a few hundred thou’ to do my current job and then show up when I wanted to – yeah, I could see that for a year or so – but I don’t love what I do, I like it and I do a good job and make decent dosh. If I could make a decent living doing cake art, I would love that and prefer that.

  19. Domino says:

    The Broncos got the uniforms used from a college team in their first year, 1960. The players burned the socks after that first year.
    We have heard of them, but have never seen them since they were worn. Games were seen in newspapers and rarely in color.

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