Fuck Your Organic Grass-Fed Food, You Hippie

So the other day Mr. A and I bought some bacon. We’d gotten a gift certificate thing for a local market that sells wine and cheese and other yummy things that pass forbreakfast dinner around here, our diet of late has been light on protein in general and fatty protein in specific, and so one of the things we picked up was a packet of bacon.

This bacon was hormone-free, antibiotic-free meat that had been gotten from happy pigs living in freedom all their lives on some farm about 10 blocks away before being humanely killed. The cheesemonger dude behind the counter made filthy orgasmic noises when we asked him about how it tasted and the package said something about applewood and smoking. It was like $12. And when I brought it home and fried it up it tasted like my very first memory of bacon, sweet and salt-crunchy and clean somehow, a real vivid taste.

Now, we wouldn’t do that every week, because that’s insane, $12 for about 20 strips of bacon, no matter how good it is, but I, unlike this writer from Time magazine, do not see such bacon’s existence as some kind of rebuke to Real America:

Eating an apple is almost always better than not eating an apple, no
matter where it came from. And getting the whole brood into the habit
of sitting down to a meal of lean meats, lots of veggies and judicious
amounts of carbs and starches is hard enough without bringing politics
into the mix.Farmers’ markets are undeniably great — if you can afford
them, if there’s one near you and if you have time between the job and
the kids to make a special trip when you know you can get everything in
a single stop at the supermarket.
The food industry undeniably churns
out all manner of dangerous and addictive junk without a shred of real
nutritional value in it, but there are also food companies that manage
to get healthy, high-quality food to market and keep the cost of it
reasonable.

Shockingly, plenty of people in my decidedly not-upper-class ‘hood manage to overcome the shackles of their children and go to the twice-a-week markets. Families, with tons of kids, double strollers, huge plastic wagon conveyances, unruly niblets everywhere if you show up much past 9 a.m.

Then again, I live in one of the bluest parts of one of the bluest states in the country, so maybe we’re all just kidding ourselves and people in the suburbs of DuPage County are too tired from going Galt to support our heirloom tomatoes. What the fuck, lately. Why does this story, which is mostly about how organic food sucks about as much as any other food does these days, take this sudden weird turn into how good food is for pussies who don’t work hard?

What a strange sentence that is. “Maybe people with REAL lives don’t have TIME for your stupid organic shit, huh?” And not for nothing but it is the very same “food purists” this article derides who spend most of their time trying to bring farmer’s markets to poor neighborhoods, with community gardening projects and even efforts to bring local produce to homeless shelters and food banks because eating decently SHOULDN’T be a matter of having to save up half the kid’s college fund, just to buy bacon.

viaVirgo.

A.

/div>

17 thoughts on “Fuck Your Organic Grass-Fed Food, You Hippie

  1. Marc says:

    “maybe we’re all just kidding ourselves and people in the suburbs of DuPage County are too tired from going Galt to support our heirloom tomatoes”
    LMAO. Brilliant.

  2. Jude says:

    I now live right across the street from a hippie co-op, so I’ll be doing more of my shopping there (Thanks, propinquity!) and buying all their organic and grass-fed stuff. It’ll be more expensive, but, you know, saving on the gas it would normally take to get to the supermarket and all, plus not throwing money at Monsanto and the other rapers of the land.
    But I don’t get the same thing what mystifies you–why in the hell is it that anyone who tries to make smarter choices, even understanding that there’s a larger (up-front, anyway) cost, gets turned into some pussy what don’t support America?
    I mean, have we internalized anit-intellectualism to the extent that thinking about the consequences of ANYTHING or taking some path other than the one of most convenience makes you into Nancy McFrillyskirt?
    Shit like that just makes my head hurt. Mostly because–and here’s the real beauty–for people who write these sorts of articles, there is no right answer. If you just eat at Mickey D’s, clearly the path of least resistance, you’re a shithead who’s creating problems for everyone else with your poor choices. If you just buy factory-farmed things, you’re contributing to unsustainable practices. If you just go out to eat, then you’re wasting money that whoever writes these articles would be happy to tell you how you should spend. And, of course, if you go to the hippie store to get your kombucha and wheatgrass smoothie and hemp lotion, then you’re clearly out of touch with how Real Americans ™ live and eat.
    Seriously. Time magazine can’t die fast enough.

  3. joejoejoe says:

    I think most farmers markets in the US are actually cheaper than the grocery store. Maybe not in affluent neighborhoods but everything costs more in affluent neighborhoods. Suprisingly, purveyers of upscale goods market to the rich! What a coinkdink.
    I’m in Daytona Beach visiting my mom and her local farmers market has cheaper everything than regular supermarket and comparable prices to Aldi or Sav-A-Lot produce.
    I don’t actually think most farmers markets are organic social engineering projects. They are mostly small farmers trying to increase sales and profitability by cutting out the middle man. Hence the term FARMERS MARKET.

  4. Diana says:

    Right on, Jude!

  5. Emil says:

    Sometimes I look at the type of silly ruminations (the above ‘article’) and I want to respond, but rarely do I find that someone has responded so perfectly to illustrate the goofiness, that my comments just aren’t required. Excellent response Jude!! Shouldn’t we be reserving our hostility, energy, thoughts, prayers and writing for such things as 2 million gallons of poisonous Corexit poured into the Gulf of Mexico, the collapse of our economy, the ongoing war on Iraq and Afghanistan, the failing of our educational system …? Is the point of such nonsense and twaddle to distract us from what matters?

  6. virgotex says:

    Wanting to eat better, fresher food not pumped full of chemicals and poisons, from a local/regional source — what a hifalutin concept. Wanting the whole quarter pound of meat in your burger to come, if not from a single cow, at least from a single farm = elitism of the highest order. You make Glenn Beck cry.
    Food quality aside, what joe3 said– the bottom line is FARMERS and RANCHERS trying to run a profitable business and hang on to said farm or ranch (often in the family for multiple generations) without having to give up their independence to food industry conglomerates like Tyson, etc.
    Supporting local growers helps the local economy- this shouldn’t be a red or blue thing.

  7. montag says:

    Funny how the people in the business of defending capitalism (and fer gawd’s sake, if there’s an entity out there devoted to defending capitalism, it’s Henry and Clare Booth Luce’sTime magazine) are also in the business of defending lack of competition and consolidation of power in industries.
    Or, maybe, this guy is just miffed that there are no Cheetos at farmers’ markets.

  8. dan mcenroe says:

    The Village in general and Time magazine in particular is a relentless cavalcade of fools who can’t help but spray paint their self-loathing across the national discourse, and, yes, they can’t die soon enough.

  9. Jezebel says:

    Amen, amen and amen to A’s righteous smackdown and the equally righteous comments. Around here (central Jersey – lots of small farms, blue collar families, immigrants (mostly Latino and Russian) and rich execs who make/made their money in NY, all in one mishmash of a community – farmers markets are definitely a community thing. The people who go there bring their kids, their dogs, their llamas (true), their parrots (also true). They – we – plan our grocery trips to include the farmers markets because we know that shopping there suppers the vendors, the farmers, who are our neighbors. We also go there because the animals that produce the meats and cheeses are humanely handled, the food is produced locally, and ohmyeverlovinggod does it taste like real food should. I have rediscovered a love of peaches, cherries, berries, tomatoes, corn, that I lost years ago, after too many years of pale, mealy, supermarket produce. Many – most – of our farmers market customers are not rich. In fact, many of the shoppers at one booth today may well be the sellers at the booth tomorrow. The rest of us are teachers, plumbers, landscapers, electricians, retirees, lawyers, whatever. We’re neighbors. And yes, if you were to ask around, I’d bet that most of us are in favor of making good, real food accessible to everyone who wants it, at a price that is consistent with a basic life necessity rather than a luxury.
    So – supporting American communities, supporting small American farmers, celebrating the bounty and beauty of this marvelous country, wanting to share that gift with as many people as possible…yeah, I can see how that makes us elitist anti-American scum.
    Actually, no, no I can’t.

  10. Jezebel says:

    (and by “suppers,” of course, I mean “supports.”. Thank you ever so much, automatic spellcheck.)

  11. The Lodger says:

    And how much of TIME’s attitude toward small business is caused by the fact that small business doesn’t and won’t ever buy ads in TIME?

  12. pansypoo says:

    hell, farmer’s markets are the best deal. of course last years growing season and peppers were a steal in oct. i froze so many. apples, corn. ONIONS! i got a huge bag of ‘dried’ onions and i have local onions til january.
    oh, and i discovered farmland bacon. pretty good bacon.

  13. paul says:

    My bullshit detector went off full blast with “between the job and the kids”. Let’s see: you’re getting the kids outside, they will see some of their friends whose parents also shop at the farmers’ market, they can help carry the bags, they can snack on yummy and nutritious prepared food, and it’s a way to spend your saturday morning without cartoons/commercials or video games.
    Anyone who has actually taken care of a kid knows that outings like farmers’ markets (heck, supermarkets too) are pure gold compared to being stuck at home.

  14. Athenae says:

    paul, for some reason that part really annoyed me, too.
    I get that things are harder when you have a little someone to pack up and transport, but I really, really hate the constant refrain in stories like this about how people used to be able to do things but now with the kids … what? The children don’t allow you to go outside? They have you tied to your chair? Just suck it up, admit you’re being lazy, and quit blaming your children for ruining your life. Jesus H. Christ in a chicken basket, most of my friends who have kids run around twice as much as I do.
    A.

  15. virgotex says:

    or alternately,
    “I used to drive a Saturn, but now since we have the two kids, we need a giant four wheel drive 12-seat Canyonero”

  16. Jude says:

    Twelve yards long, two lanes wide.
    Sixty-five tons of American pride!
    Canyonero, Canyoneroooooooo!

  17. Wow. Just, wow.
    Nashville’s Farmer’s Market is, ironically, located in our urban neighborhood, North Nashville. As in, black people. ZOMG black people buying produce from the Farmer’s Market ZOMG ZOMG!!!
    Here’s another thing: I’ve lived in Nashville since 1986 and our Farmer’s Market has ALWAYS been located here. And snotty eitist hippies from West Meade and Green Hills and Hillsboro Village and other areas of Nashville all shop there. Along with the “locals.”
    What a tragedy that we have failed to live up to Time Magazine’s stereotype.

Comments are closed.