Above is a classicsideshow banner by Fred G. Johnson but it also describes the current state of the GOP race. We’ve had the Bachmann wingnut overdrive surge, the Gov Package Check surge, the Cain surge and subsequent Gingery wreck. Now it’s Newt-mentum. Newt Fucking Gingrich: are you fucking kidding me? The same guy who once suggested that thechildren of welfare recipients be sent to orphanages?Same asshole. The Obama campaign people must be pinching themselves over their luck right now. Newt Fucking Gingrich?
I’ve never seen anything like this: every campaign shifts into freak show mode from time to time but this is never ending. The latest freak show twist is reality teevee show host Donald Trump moderating a debate. Donald Fucking Trump? Really: the no truth telling, net worth lying motherfucker Donald Trump? I’ve gotta give Ron Paul and Jon Huntsman props for telling this bad hair shitbird that they’re not playing in his sandbox. The rest will likely go along because it’s all freak show, all the time.
Where does it end? Just imagine the reality teevee themed debate possibilities:
Sing for Simon Cowell.Super Freakwould be a good numbah for these bozos.
Eat bugs for Jeff Probst. Who among us wouldn’t get a kick out of seeing Mitt Haircut spend 30 days without shaving or hair gel?
Cook with gummi bears and warthog forChopped’sTed Allen.
Strut the runway in drag forMad Fashion’s Chris March and the Project Runway judges. I bet Michael Kors would have a few good zingers for the candidates. I’d pay good money to see Newt in stiletto heels…
The variations are infinite. Any suggestions, y’all?