In Which Yet Another Newspaper Fucks That Chicken

Oregonian, what on earth.

This line in the Oregonian’s announcement confused me and others, and led me to believe that the paper will be delivered three days a week, with the Saturday paper delivered on Sunday: “Home delivery will be Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday, and include the Saturday edition as a bonus.” I called publisher Chris Anderson and he said the paper will be delivered to homes four days a week.BUT… this is what his announcement says: “Those home delivery subscribers that choose the three-day subscription option will also have access to a digital edition seven days a week.”

Will somebody please inform the corporate weasel-speak writers of the world that EVERYONE ALREADY KNOWS THE INTERNET IS ALWAYS ON? A digital edition seven days a week? You mean you don’t unplug this thing at dusk? Well, slap my ass, Irma, we’s gonna read us an Internet on Sundays, too!

A.

4 thoughts on “In Which Yet Another Newspaper Fucks That Chicken

  1. Kevin says:

    Advance’s new stance is that its online, flippable PDF editions somehow count as an edition for subscribers. It’s pretty insulting to newspaper readers, who know that they can go online 24/7, PDF edition or not.
    Meanwhile, The Times-Picayune, which cut print editions to three a week last fall, will now launch a print product on the days it doesn’t print. Those papers won’t be delivered, but subscribers will have access to the flip edition on their computers. Again, it makes little sense, because anyone – subscriber or not – can go on the website at any time.

  2. Athenae says:

    Meanwhile, The Times-Picayune, which cut print editions to three a week last fall, will now launch a print product on the days it doesn’t print.
    This continues to be, just, I mean. No. “Digital is the future except here is some paper, which is also the future? Kind of?” I hope the marketing incoherence is being studied somewhere so that future generations can learn something from all this fail.
    A.

  3. When I read about the Oregonian going to 3 days a week, I didn’t have to look up the name of the owners on the internet – that internet which is actually on all the time.

  4. gratuitous says:

    You know what really help out the Oregonian? If its editorial slant wasn’t so heavily tilted to its big advertisers. The newspaper does a fair amount of local and neighborhood coverage, but you can bet a dollar to a hole in a donut that anytime a local interest conflicted with the Big Plans of our betters, the Oregonian would be there, huffing and puffing about backwards provincials and their failure to appreciate how wonderful that new strip mall was going to be. Or why that wetland’s development wasn’t such a big deal in the grand scheme of things. And so on.

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