America Held Hostage Day 11


Prelude To A Cave: There appears to be a light at the end of the shutdown tunnel. Why? The GOP is shocked, shocked by a NBC/WSJ poll
showing that people hate them and blame them for all the bad shit
that’s happening. I wish they were caving because they’re patriotic and cared
about the country but a cave is a cave is a cave is a cave. I’m long past expecting the Me Party to do anything unselfish and in the national interest and 70% of the country agrees with me.

Buzzing In The Beehive State: Speaking of unpopular, Ted Cruz’s sidekick Utah Senator Mike Lee’sapproval
rating has dipped to 40% in deep red Utah. That’s right Utah, home of
the Mormons, Karl Malone, and sister wives. Lee is the idiot cousin of
the Senators Udall and I’m amazed that Cruz even speaks to Lee since he
went to BYU and Cruz would only study with other Ivy League grads when
he attended Havud Law School. Snooty elitist cocksucker. Does Sarah Palin know
about this?

Hollywood Wingnut Blues:Right wing actor James Woods
is getting all whiny and victimy over the guvmint shutdown. As a good
wingnut, he blames Obama for everything, including his alleged future unemployability after tweeting this:

Barack Obama’s petty jihad against World War II heroes is simply the
nadir of politics in America. He is just vile. A small, small man.

Woods is actually a very good actor,especially if you’re looking for someone to play a racist right wing prick such as Roy Cohn or HR Haldeman. Interestingly enough, he’s worked with Oliver Stone on several occasions, and Stone is known to say “Viva Fidel” at the drop of a hat. I guess Woods has forgotten that the blacklist is a tool used by right wing tools in the film industry, not by the liberal cabal that he imagines is out to get him. If a director needs a gifted dickhead to play an asshole role, Woods will be cast. Make that type cast…

Ditka Dumbassery:Former Bears and Saints Coach Mike Ditkahas made an unwelcome return to the national scene by musing about a political campaign he didn’t mount in 2004:

Confident that he would have come out on top, former NFL coach Mike
Ditka said earlier this month that he regrets not running in Illinois’s
2004 U.S. Senate race and stopping Barack Obama’s career in its tracks.

“Biggest mistake I’ve ever made,” Ditka said while attending the opening ceremony of North Dakota’s Oil Patch, according to the Dickinson Press. “Not that I would have won, but I probably would have and he wouldn’t be in the White House.”

Ditka is well known for playing 12 years in the NFL without a helmet and for being an absolutely horrendous coach of the New Orleans Saints from 1997 to 1999. I hope his tea party pals haven’t seen the “wedding” picture of him and noted dreadlock wearing pothead, Ricky Williams:


It’s probably a good thing from the Republican perspective that Ditka wasn’t elected to the Senate. He’s the world’s worst negotiator: he traded away all of the Saints draft choices to pick Ricky who drove Ditka batshit crazy with his preference for chillaxing over being all manly and shit.

Finally, in the spirit of helpfulness for which I am well known, I’d like to suggest a theme song for the default denial caucus: