Twas the Friday before Christmas and there was a wee brawl between Oscar and Della Street that woke me up way too early. I think he dissed Perry Mason or something. No spiked eggnog for them. I may make them eat fruitcake. That was an idle threat because we don’t have one, and I would never purchase one except to use as a doorstop or paper weight. Okay, on with the post where, unlike Joe Friday, I offer opinions, m’am, just opinions. If there *are* any facts, they can be found after the break.
Viva La Cordura: Sanity finally came to US-Cuba relations about 25 years too late. The boycott has never worked but as long as there was a Soviet Union it made a little sense, very little. Not having a full Ambassador in Cuber was a vestige of the Cold War and I’m glad we’ll have one now. I’m considering applying for the job. I speak a little Spanish, very little.
There were two very cool things about this story. First, it did not leak. I didn’t think it was possible for anything in Washington not to leak. That wasn’t just cool it was way cool, just like Fee Waybill. Second, Pope Frank’s involvement means that he’s on the shit list of elderly Miami Cubans and GOP politicians, which is a good place to be.
Not Coming To A Theatre Near You: The whole Sony hacking saga came to a sorry end when the studio pulled the bro-comedy The Interview from release. Actually, they let the big theatre chains cave for them. I guess nobody in the movie biz has noticed past OTT threats from North Korea, which have never come to pass. They’ve never nuked us or turned the Sea of Japan into a sea of blood, which would be akin to Moses/Heston/Bale parting the Red Sea. I wouldn’t even believe them if they threatened to force the head of Sony Pictures to eat uncleaned blow fish or fugu. How’s that for a new threat: eat blow fish and die, motherfugu.
Speaking of show business and sanity, or lack thereof. I’ve had a busy week in my role as unofficial, self-appointed consigliere of the Krewe of Spank, so the Freak Show post is running late. Besides, the show is on holiday hiatus until January 7 so there’s no rush. I may spring it on you when you least expect it like the Spanish Inquisition, which nobody expects. Btw, I dressed as Cardinal Fang one year for Mardi Gras complete with a Cardinals hat, St. Louis Cardinals, that is.
Malakatude Update: I neglected to make fun of Blake Farenthold’s *real* first name, which is Randolph. That makes him one randy malaka. I also learned via long time reader Montag that legendary Texas liberal Sissy Farenthold is Malaka Dudebro’s Aunt and endorsed him in a fit a of family values. I hope she’s pitching a Sissy hissy fit over her nephew’s malakatude.
Hologram Bud Selig: The Milwaukee Brewers are planning to keep the memory of former owner and retiring Commissioner Bud Selig alive forever via hologram. It’s unclear as to whether he’ll interact with Data, Doctor Picardo, or Quark but I sure hope so. End of obligatory Star Trek reference. The best thing about this story is that Keith Olbermann has been having a lot of fun with it this week on his ESPN show:
Btw, they’re calling it the Bud Selig Experience. I wonder if Purple Haze will be the theme song for this freak show?
Reading Assignment: Remember when Newsweek Magazine mattered? They used to have a special issue after every Presidential election with the inside story of the campaign, which was always fun. In the same vein, the Guardian ran a swell two part story about the Scottish #IndyRef and what happened behind the scenes in both the NO and YES camps. We learn that David Cameron double crossed his temporary Labour Party allies and faced the Wrath of Gordon, which is much like the Wrath of Khan only with a Scots accent and without the Corinthian leather. End of second obligatory Star Trek reference.
I have one more reading suggestion. It’s an excerpt from Eric Altermann’s book about the Beltway punditocracy, which focuses on the self loathing liberals at the New Republic. Hint: Marty Peretz is the villain of the piece. Anyone surprised? I thought not.