The One-Day Story: In Which I Give Melania Trump’s People Some Free Advice

Oh, Melania. I so want you to succeed because I have a feeling you just married a rich dude, and now you’re in the middle of this shitshow, and I kind of dig your cheekbones. But now you’re in the middle of this shitshow for your own thing, and this is not helping.

Guys, you fire the speechwriter, you say hey, we fucked up hiring whatsisnuts, he’ll never eat lunch in this town again, and by tomorrow everybody will be talking about something else. Probably some other preventable emergency you created. That’s how these things work. It’s a one-day story. It’s a miserable story but you apologize and then it’s over.

You do this, you faff around with “it’s not really plagiarism” and “it’s Hillary’s fault!” and “everybody plagiarizes” and you make it a two-week clusterfuck that never ends. You prolong the story. You prolong your own agony. You continue it on and on and on.

Just STOP IT. People will laugh and then in a week you can pretend it’s funny too and it’ll be over. Keep this defensive shit up and it’s the six-pointed star all over again.

A.

One thought on “The One-Day Story: In Which I Give Melania Trump’s People Some Free Advice

  1. gratuitous says:

    So unseemly! All this kerfuffle over the latest Mrs. Trump reading Mrs. Obama’s words off the teleprompter. What’s the big to-do, people? Are we really going to get into all the mean things that have been said about Michelle Obama over the last eight years? We can argue all day about who called who Moochelle, but at the end of the day, Republicans are darned mad, too. So let’s just agree that everybody made mistakes, and move on.

    Like

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