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Welcome Back to California

Some say the best part of going away is the coming home.

Well it’s certainly nice to be home. At least I know where everything is supposed to be and generally is unless of course I moved it before we left because “It’ll be so much easier to find it when we get home”.

When we left California there was still a pandemic going. When we got home…not so much. I mean it’s still going on everywhere else, but here in the Golden State it’s become as clothing optional as Baker Beach. And by clothing I mean masks. Masked up I walked out of our favorite coffee house with hot Joe to go on our way out of town, came back to find Safeway has only a few people wearing masks working there, no customers wearing them, and all social distancing signs, posters, stickers, and/or any related chazerai gone.

And I mean gone. Zero, nada, nilch, the big bagel.

Pandemic? What pandemic? Never heard of such a thing. Go on with your silly self.

The only Delta variant we know about is if DL345 JFK to SFO gets diverted to DFW and we need to XPD OTO ASAP.

Acronyms — just like words only more confusing.

I was expecting that there would be a gradual slide back to normal once the state fully “reopened”.  All the coverage I was able to read or watch on TV from afar seemed to indicate that was what was going on. Masks were still on faces, distances were still observed, and at least in the beginning things would slowly return to normal. It was going as expected so I stopped following reopening stories.

What a difference a week makes. And a state.

On our way back through Oregon it was still mass pandemic mode. Limited is still the working theme in the Beaver State, as in “we have limited seating for our limited menu and only during our limited operating hours”. But hey, Trump flags are still flying and nobody seems to be working so tell me again how this is working out for ya? It’s so bad the wife (Cruella), who had been yelling “HE LOST” at any Trump sign still up or flag still waving, had to stop it or risk losing her voice. And this in a state where Biden won with almost 60% of the vote.

But then again it’s a state whose travel industry is based on getting tourists to come up and become live bait to catch Bigfoot. Of course that might help explain their fascination with the Big Orange Julius Caesar Salad. Is it that much of a stretch to go from believing in Bigfoot to believing in The Big Lie? Both are conspiracy land creations designed to explain what to a simple mind is unexplainable. Both are promogulated by so called experts with little to no actual expertise.  And both are perpetrated by and for the enrichment of a select group of individuals. Kinda sounds like they go hand in hand.

Besides, have you ever seen a picture of Trump and Bigfoot together? As the QAnonuts say “do the research”.

Meanwhile here in California it looks like we’ve weathered germ warfare…er…I mean a once in a century naturally occurring viral explosion. Just in time to put bricks in our toilet tanks, low flow shower heads on in our showers, and watch as our lawns wither and die in the water parched summer heat. One natural disaster at a time is how we roll here in the best of all possible worlds.

“Well this living off the road is getting pretty old” Yeah Levon you got that right.

Shapiro Out