Keep Your Shirts On, Steve

I wish Steve Bannon were feeling pursued like the guy in the alley in Samuel Fuller’s Underworld USA. Instead, he’s emoting for the Impeached Insult Comedian hoping to be forgiven for being so chatty with Michael Wolff for his first Trump regime book. Like his lord and master, Steve Bannon is a windbag as well as a hungry wolf, not Wolff.

I feel a premature musical interlude coming on:

One thing about Bannon that’s always amused me is his tendency to wear multiple layers of clothing even in warm weather. Hence the post title; a variation on one of my favorite bits of 1930’s slang. Jimmy Cagney was wont to say “keep your shirt on” to nervous guys staring at the barrel of his gun.

Does Bannon think he’s a Romanov smuggling the family jewels out of Russia? He always looks like an unmade bed, and I say that as someone who is not exactly a fashionista. All I know about fashion, I learned from Project Runway and this song:

I know, I’ve posted that before. What can I tell ya? It’s fab-fab-fabulous.

Back to the news of the weak week. The full House of Representative found the contemptible criminal Steve Bannon in criminal contempt. Only nine Republicans did the right thing and treated Bannon with the contempt he deserves. Human butt-plug Steve Scalise invoked the party whip in support of Mr. Unmade Bed. Ugh, just ugh.

Speaking of loathsome cretins and dipshits, the Texas twit, Louis Gohmert Piles is back in the news. He made a disgusting and bizarre comparison of a sit-in led by the late great John Lewis to the Dipshit Insurrection. I am not making this up:

“On June 22 of 2016, judge, most of the Democrat members of Congress took over the House floor, and, for the first time in American history, members of Congress obstructed official proceedings,” Gohmert said.

“Not for 4 to 6 hours, but for virtually 26 hours,” he continued. “Not just violating over a dozen House rules, but actually committing the felony that some of the Jan. 6 people are charged with.”

Gohmert noted that “nobody has been charged” for the sit-in, despite Jan. 6 defendants being “viciously” prosecuted for the same thing.

“Those kinds of things — where you let Democrat members of Congress off for the very thing that you’re viciously going after people that were protesting on Jan. 6 — gives people the indication that there is a two-tiered justice system here in America,” the congressman said.

I don’t recall anyone carrying a Confederate flag or taking a dump on the rug. That’s Trumpism in a wingnut shell: all grievance and no substance.

I wish Louis Gohmert Piles would waltz across Texas and into obscurity:

There’s some Lost Cause news out of the Tennessee lege:

Sen. Frank Nicely (R-Strawberry Plains) rose to say once his grandson asked him if the South really lost what Nicely called the “the war between the states.” Nicely told his grandson, “it’s too early to tell,” he said.

“When I compare their Northern cities with our Southern cities, and their debt loads to our debt -free states and all these great companies like Ford and Smith & Wesson coming down South, I think I can tell my grandson the war between the states is going on and we’re winning.”

It’s a pity that Frank hasn’t taught his grandson to play Nicely. What can you expect from an unrepentant birther?

Strawberry Plains sounds nice. I wonder if it’s anything like this:

You say war between the states, I say war of the rebellion. Let’s call the whole thing off.

Now that I have Tennessee on my mind, John Hiatt & The Goners get the last word: