Malaka Of The Week: Laura Murphy

Another person has emerged from obscurity to be “honored” in this space. This time, it’s a Virginia woman whose crusade against Toni Morrison’s Beloved ran from 2013 to 2017. It was recently revived as a wedge issue by Republican gubernatorial candidate Glenn Youngkin.  And that is why Laura Murphy is malaka of the week.

There are so many time shifts in this story that I’ve enlisted the help of Mr. Peabody, his boy Sherman, and the Wayback Machine:

Murphy’s son was a senior in high school when our saga began in 2013. Reading Beloved was too much for the poor baby:

Now a freshman at the University of Florida, Blake Murphy, 19, recalled reading the book before bed and having night terrors after he fell asleep.

“It was disgusting and gross,” he said. “It was hard for me to handle. I gave up on it.”

School officials point out that AP English is a college-level class that often involves discussions of adult topics.

“To me, mature references means slavery or the Holocaust,” Laura Murphy said. “I’m not thinking my kid is going to be reading a book with bestiality.”

I wonder if it steered the lad away from being an Aggie to life as a Gator? Enough sophomoric levity.

Beloved *is* about slavery. It’s a searing account of the cruelty and barbarism of the slave system. Is such a book supposed to be soothing? The fact that Beloved scared poor Blakie wakie is evidence of its power. Great literature is supposed to evoke strong reactions. All that Laura Murphy remembers is that there’s bestiality in the book. Holy animal husbandry, Batman.

During her 4-year crusade against this beloved novel, Murphy disclaimed any intent to ban this or any other book. She was lying: that was exactly the impact of her efforts. Funny thing that the author is Black. Imagine that,

Blake Murphy was so terrified by reading Beloved that he’s now a lawyer for the Republican National Committee. That means he lies for a living. His mother lied for her cause. Which is worse? Beats the hell outta me.

Cue the Wayback Machine:

In the years since her son wet the bed over Beloved, Laura Murphy helped push a bill through the then GOP controlled Virginia Lege requiring parental consent for books malakas like her deem offensive. Governor Terry McAuliffe aka the Macker vetoed the so-called Beloved bill. Murphy was not pleased but vanished from airing her malakatude in public until this year.

Hit it, Mr. Peabody:

Good boy, Sherman.

Glenn Youngkin is trying to thread the Trumper needle in his campaign against the Macker who was obliged to sit out four years because of a fakakata law that limits Governors to one term at a time. Youngkin was all palsy-walsy with the Impeached Insult Comedian in the Republican primary, but he’s trying to keep his distance in the general election. Why?  Virginia has gone Democratic in every presidential election since 2008. And Northern Virginia is loaded with federal employees. Rumor has it that they take a dim view of the Dipshit Insurrection. Imagine that.

What’s a troubled candidate, in a state where the GOPers haven’t won a statewide race since 2009, to do? Embrace the culture war cliches embraced by GOPers everywhere, that’s what.

Critical race theory? Youngkin is agin it; even if it isn’t taught in Virginia schools.

Mask mandates in schools? Youngkin is agin them and for freedom, man.

There are times that Youngkin sounds like he’s running for school board in the most benighted county in the Commonwealth.

Looking for the largest dog whistle possible, Youngkin seized on Laura Murphy and her bestiality fixation. The result was this ad:

Poor Mommy Malaka Murphy dissed by the mean old Macker. That nice Glenn Youngkin listens.

Notice that neither the title of the book nor the race of the author is not mentioned in the ad. They don’t even urge banning the beastly book in question. This is some old school Republican dog whistling. Tricky Dick would be proud of Glenn Youngkin.

The Virginia governor’s race has been nationalized by all concerned. The Democrats are rolling out the big guns: Obama, Harris, and Biden. The Republicans are rolling out Laura Murphy and her weenie shyster son. And that is why Laura Murphy is malaka of the week.

I gave myself an earworm while pondering Blake Murphy’s matriculating at the University of Florida. Tom Petty is from Gainesville. That’s why he gets the last word:

2 thoughts on “Malaka Of The Week: Laura Murphy

  1. I got shot down suggesting this slogan when I was working for Don Beyer when he was running for lieutenant governor of Virginia back in oh s*** was it 89? Don’t let young can carry us back to Old Virginie

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