Dear Moronic Corporate Disaster,
I am very happy to announce that as of this moment, I resign.
It may interest you to know that soon I shall be earning twice your salary in a new field: I shall be involved in the flinging of porcupines between ocean going cargo ships and the shore. We plan to attach messages to the backs of these porcupines and in some cases, to write directly on them. We hope that some day this new form of communication, we call it the Porcupine-Mail-Service or PMS, will really take off. Perhaps one day in the not-so-distant future will also use it as a method of communication. I must stress, that as of this moment, we have not hurt any porcupines. They appear to enjoy it. Possibly because we pay the porcupines much more than you paid me. It may also interest you to know, we also pay the parasitic species of louse that has only ever caused problems for their porcupine hosts more than you paid me.