Fuck You Rudy, Love, Stripe Fox and Little Joe

It has been pointed out to me by everybody on the face of the planet (and I thank you all) that Rudy Giuliani is an anti-ferret asshole:

“There’s something deranged about you. The excessive concern you have for ferrets is something you should examine with a therapist. There is something really really sad about you. You need help. This excessive concern with little weasels is a sickness … you are devoting your life to weasels.”

And yeah, it’s funny, because it’s about furballs who steal your keys and only one of your shoes, JOE and hide them under the couch, but it’s also, you know, what a condescending douchebag. Not that we didn’t know this. What difference does it make to Rudy if the dude loves his ferrets? He tells that guy to get a life, but honestly, he spends the entire next segment giving him psychological counseling about his ferret fixation. Let it go. If it bothers you that much, dickhead, get a screener and don’t let your angry callers through.

Anyway, the world was full of ferret-related dumbassery while I was gone:

San Diego-based Ferrets Anonymous commissioned the Field Poll to gauge public opinion on critters, but found that only 38 percent of those queried support legalizing ferrets, while 43 percent support gay marriage, according to the San Jose Mercury News.

Because gay people are just like animals, in a way. Aaaaaack.

Plus, what about GAY FERRETS? Won’t anyone think of them? They think of you … naked.

A.

8 thoughts on “Fuck You Rudy, Love, Stripe Fox and Little Joe

  1. BuggyQ says:

    We could learn a lot from ferrets and other small furry things. Take joy in hiding small things. Relax thoroughly. Stretching feels good. Republicans suck.
    Wise creatures.

  2. Jack K. says:

    …Ferrets Anonymous?!
    What must their 12-step program looks like…

  3. pansypoo says:

    i played with baby ferrets at a pet store. they liked climbing under my coat up my sleeves. i coulda shoplifted one! everybody should have pet period. it might make humans better.

  4. Tlazolteotl says:

    I don’t have ferrets, like I don’t have reptiles, because having birds, I don’t think it is a great idea to also have ferrets or reptiles; and the birds were here first. Saying I am not equipped to have a certain animal as a pet doesn’t mean nobody else should be able to. Is isn’t as if ferrets are endangered (or are they?). Many parrot species that people keep as pets *are* endangered species in the wild – one should get domestically bred pets, that don’t have to be taken out of the wild.
    But I don’t understand being “anti-ferret” as if nobody should keep them as pets. That’s just batty.

  5. virgotex says:

    I thought ALL ferrets were gay.

  6. TheaLogie says:

    Pfeh. He’s got nothin’, so he’s just sniping at a convenient minority.
    Why get the goat of people who own ferrets and not, say, small dogs such as chihuahuas and dachshunds? Back in the day, both had the same function. Ferrets were used as ratters, and probably still are in some rural areas. (More recently, I recall seeing people betting on ‘ferret derbies’ where one or two of them were put in a maze of tunnels and bets were placed as to where they’d come out. Kinda like a raffle but fluffier.)
    And as I think A. has enumerated previously, if you can handle the antics of kittens, ferrets are somewhat similar.

  7. Hates ferrets? That hurts, ’cause if Rudy knows anything it’s weasels. He’s surrounded himself with them for years. Sees one every day in the mirror when he shaves.
    But that ain’t the type of weasel we all know and love around here. We all heart A’s Boyz. And who could hate them? I mean, what a perfect metaphor for the GOP – railing against little furry animals. What next? Kitten-O-Matic?
    Every time we catch a glimpse into the inner thoughts of the Republican leadership, we continue to see a slimy nastiness that 6 months buried in a swamp couldn’t produce.
    I can’t even wrap my head around the possibility of any of these cretins – Giuliani, Romney, McCain, especially Tancredo – setting up shop in the White House in 2008. An asteroid crashing into the earth is a happier thought.
    Talk about your global disasters.

  8. joejoejoe says:

    Where do I donate to Ferret Blog Readers for Truth? If I give enough do I get to be Ambassador to Belgium in the next Democratic Administration? Judi ‘Giuliani’ (since when isn’t it Judy Nathan?) apparently was using dogs as part of demonstration for medical equipment and euthanizing them. It doesn’t seem like the Giulianis are very animal friendly. Does anyone know when the next Giuliani fundraising cockfight is taking place?

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