Geek Presidency

The drawbacks:

So I was listening to an interview from last week on a show called
Spark — CBC Radio’s internet-culture and new technology program.

they had this man named Tom Armitage on it talking about how the next
generation of world leaders will all have been raised on video games,
and speculating on what video games might have taught these future
leaders. The tone was very optimistic.

As a life-long gamer
myself, I thought I’d compile a list of things future prime ministers
and presidents and chancellors might have learnt from video games that
might be applicable to the world situation. To wit:


* The only defence necessary is a three-foot wall around your country. No one can jump over that.

* Ammunition is a useless expense. Even if your guns aren’t the kind
with infinite bullets, clips and rounds can be found scattered about
the landscape.

* The best training for new soldiers is massacring rabbits.

* All outposts and research centres must be designed as a series of
barely-jumpable platforms interspersed with occasional treasure chests,
and sometimes chicken legs concealed in the bricks of the walls.

Wars aren’t won by armies, only by small ragtag troupes of two to eight
members who each have their own distinctive skill set, uniforms, and
hair style.

Health Care

* It’s not necessary to
set residency spaces or hire doctors. By the mere act of picking up a
medical kit, anyone can instantly heal the most grievous bullet wounds.

* Death is a minor inconvenience.

* All hospitals will eventually become battlefields, or haunted by
zombie nurses wielding lead pipes. In other words, don’t build any.


2 thoughts on “Geek Presidency

  1. I would hope that they were raiders in world of warcraft, where they learn about teamwork and knowing your class. Coming prepared with your consumables, reagents, and gear all repaired. Use the right gear for the particular raid at hand, with the necessary enchants or gems.
    I hope they also know about pick up groups and the nightmare of the selfish guy who wipes the group over and over or ninjas the loot, just because he’s a jerk.
    These things happen in the game, but are all applicable to real life, whether it’s in Washington or your office.

  2. Hilarious!
    But if they get their clues from Jack Bauer and CSI, what makes you think this isn’t how they think?

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