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The Irks Of March

I realize that the Ides of March is this Wednesday but I’m unsure if I’ll be irked on that date. Besides, a pun is a terrible thing to waste.

Our more alert readers have surely noticed that the featured image has nothing to with Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar. That’s where the soothsayer warned about the Ides of March. We have a movie Caesar but it’s Rex Harrison in Cleopatra. Why? Why the hell not? It was a bad movie, but Liz Taylor looked great in the title role. That’s why.

I wrote this post in a hurry, which is irksome in and of itself.

Have I irked you enough to get on with it? Let’s get irked.

I’m irked that the same people who are desperate to see Donald Trump in the dock are vexed that the Manhattan District Attorney’s office might be first to indict.

I’ve heard some tut-tutting because it’s the Stormy Daniels case not something sexier. What’s sexier than a porn star with fake boobs? Everything.

Our first musical interlude is not the obvious song but it’s by one of my go-to bands:

I’m irked that people have forgotten my admonition: The Law Is Slow. It’s not a race. Investigations take time, especially those that started slowly-DOJ and Fulton County-or were interrupted like the Stormy Daniels case.

Repeat after me: The Law Is Slow.

Impatient amateur lawyers should heed Lonesome Dave Peverett and Foghat:

I’m irked that fictional depictions of the legal system make people think the law is swift, not slow. The fine Showtime series Your Honor just showed a defendant go on trial within days of his arrest so they could have a trial scene in the penultimate episode. There’s no honor in that.

I’d be harder on them, but it’s filmed in New Orleans. Plus, I honor the show’s cast, which does justice to the material or some such shit.

I’m irked that the Muskified bird app overlords tagged this post as objectionable:

I appealed and won on the Night Owl edition but I still have no idea why this happened. Methinks firing all those engineers wasn’t wise. Were they all like this guy?

Another non-obvious version of the obvious stoned engineer song. The recently departed David Lindley played guitar on that track from Deadicated. I’m neither irked nor vexed about any of that. Obviously.

Finally, I’m irked about the Oscars again. Everything Everywhere All At Once won best picture. I dislike dystopian fiction, but I didn’t have an opinion about that movie until last Saturday.

I was at my friend’s Greg and Christy’s annual Irish Channel parade party and my buddy Bob sat down next to me. You’ve met his wife Julie recently: she’s my Murdaugh Mishigas muse. The posts I wrote about that pasty faced murderer are on her head. Sheesh, now I’m channeling Felix Unger.

Anyway, Bob looked me in the eye and said: “You’re a smart guy, an intellectual. You’ve seen a lot of movies. Did you see Everything Everywhere All At Once? More importantly, did you understand it?”

That was a paraphrase because I was under the influence of home brew and Irish whiskey but answer was simple: “No, I have not.”

Bob is a smart guy too. If he didn’t get it, it’s not worth the struggle to try. Besides, dissing dystopian fiction is my jam.

Capturing the title of Everything Everywhere All At Once in song requires multiple last words from The Temptations, Jackson Browne, and Bonnie Raitt:

3 thoughts on “The Irks Of March”

  1. I have only seen Everything Everywhere All At Once/ once.

    I didn’t think of it as dystopian fiction — it’s a family drama with tons of surreal elements and a few pop culture references thrown in.

      1. Then the trailer is misleading. Looks like confused crap to me.

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