Today’s Best Sentence on the Internet

“Never trust a sex toy site that repeatedly can’t spell ‘sexual’ correctly.”

A.

ps. Christian sex toys? Not really. They’re just the usual dildos and whatnot with the packaging removed (eww) so the people buying the “pleasure sleeves” won’t have to see pictures of naked bodies because THAT would be too much sin.

pps.This?

This hot
relationship game is a fun way to keep communication going between
couples and allow them to try new and exciting intimate actions. After
the first few years of romance, couples tend to find that naughty
lingerie and nights exploring each other’s erogenous zones can
be forgotten and replaced by arguments over whose turn it is to buy the
frozen peas. A Hot Affair brings back the art of seduction, laughter
and lust through a game so neither of you needs to be the instigator.
It really does lead to the feeling that you are having an affair… but
with your spouse!

Should be called A Future Divorce.

7 thoughts on “Today’s Best Sentence on the Internet

  1. Jude says:

    WITH THE FUCKING PACKAGING REMOVED?
    What the fucking fuck is wrong with these fucking morons? Sweet god, if you’re buying a sex toy, I don’t care if it comes with pictures of Care Bear porn all over it–you want that fucker in a sealed package that takes three pairs of scissors, a blowtorch, and the fucking jaws of life to get into.
    I’m gonna go puke now.

    Like

  2. dr2chase says:

    Look at the bright side — maybe some pervert has found a way to sell used sex toys to gullible people. Good old American ingenuity, marketing, and free enterprise, what’s not to like?

    Like

  3. MapleStreet says:

    I’m vacillating.
    Do I focus on the prudishness that buys the toy but without the images (not to mention the sanitary issues raised above) or do I congratulate them for figuring out that religion and sex aren’t opposites?

    Like

  4. pansypoo says:

    they don’t possess sharpies? eew. on the bright side, they DO get unsanitary sex toys.

    Like

  5. joejoejoe says:

    Jamming some kind of an custom designed object in your naughty bits isn’t a relationship game, it’s playing with a sex toy.

    Like

  6. Brooklyn Girl says:

    Do they come to your house to make sure you’re married?

    Like

  7. Interrobang says:

    Ha ha ha. Over at ONTD_political the idiot Christer says “I don’t think [dildoes] had been invented yet.” Er, wrong again — what do you think Ezekiel 16:17means, huh?
    (That’s “Thou hast also taken thy fair jewels of my gold and of my silver, which I had given thee, and madest to thyself images of men, and didst commit whoredom with them” if you don’t have a Bible handy.)

    Like

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