Malaka Of The Week: Corey Lewandowski

The Insult Comedian and Trump’s Trump. Photo by Joe Skipper/Reuters,

Stories about campaign managers usually describe how shrewd they are but 2016 is not an ordinary year. I’ve never compared a campaign manager to a bouncer before but that’s what Corey Lewandowski of Team Trump reminds me of. And that’s why he’s malaka of the week.

Like his candidate, Lewandowski acts like a professional rasslin’ villain. I only hope Gawker or TMZ don’t have a Hulk Hogan-like sex tape of this mook. Like the Hulkster, I suspect Malaka Corey shouts the odd racial epithet whilst in the throes of unspeakable passion but I digress. This lout, who is best described at Trump’s Trump, popped his cork the other day when BuzzFeed kicked him in the bollocks with a detailed account of his persistent misogynistic malakatude:

As Donald Trump faces questions about his campaign manager’s physical altercation with a protester over the weekend, BuzzFeed News has learned new details about the hard-charging operative’s behavior that raise questions about his judgment and the environment inside the Trump campaign.

In recent interviews with more than half a dozen sources who have worked with Trump’s top aide, Corey Lewandowski, the strategist was accused of pushing a CNN reporter who tried to ask the candidate a question; physically confronting an aide for a rival campaign in a post-debate spin room; publicly shouting threats over the phone at a restaurant; making sexual comments about female journalists; and calling up women in the campaign press corps late at night to make unwanted romantic advances.

Asked Monday for comment on these allegations, Lewandowski emailed, “Your story is factually inaccurate.” When BuzzFeed news asked him to clarify which portions of the story he was challenging, he wrote, “Be sure before you accuse me of something it’s accurate. And, in these instances you are wrong.”

Lie and deny is central to Team Trump’s modus operandi. They lie so much that the reporters covering them are unable to keep up with the daily flow of sewerage. There are so many lies that it would be like trying to measure blood at a busy abattoir. It’s appropriate that all my analogies are disgusting. It’s the Insult Comedian’s favorite word, after all. His campaign manager is a DISGUSTING LOSER.

I’ve written some harsh things about political consultants, handlers, and flacks over the years, but I’ve never called one a thug or goon before. Lewandowski is more like Paulie Walnuts than Karl Rove even if he’s on the road to having Turd Blossom’s hair instead of Paulie’s.

There was apparently a point at which the Insult Comedian’s staff was on the verge of rebelling against Malaka Corey but then they started winning. The Insult Comedian likes WINNERS, so the coup never came off. But Lewandowski’s reputation for vulgar, bad, and boorish behavior dates to his time as a Kochsucker with Americans for Prosperity:

Lewandowski rebounded from running former New Hampshire Sen. Bob Smith’s failed 2002 re-election campaign to a job with AFP, where he eventually rose to regional director for East Coast operations during his more than five years with the group.

While one former coworker called Lewandowski a “cowboy” who lent AFP a “cool factor,” he was reportedly known for heated exchanges with those who crossed him. He reportedly fell out of favor with the group after he loudly berated a female employee who challenged him during an October 2013 board meeting in Manhattan. Three anonymous sources told Politico how Lewandowski proceeded to get in the woman’s personal space and called her a “cunt” in front of fellow AFP employees, including senior officials.

This is the man who has become Trump’s very hands-on right-hand (wing?) man. And we know that the Insult Comedian never apologizes even when he’s egregiously wrong. It’s something he has in common with Dick Cheney; that and a love of torture. I’d like to see Trump and Malaka Corey waterboarded to see if they think it’s torture. Of course, that would muss the Trumpian cotton candy piss coiff so it will never happen.

The newfound prominence of a violent creep like Corey Lewandowski shows that the barbarians are truly at the gate. The feckless #NeverTrump gang show few signs of being able to stop the barbarian hordes from overrunning their party. It’s up to the Democrats to keep Corey Lewandowski from turning the West Wing into an adjunct of the WWE. It’s time to thump Trump’s Trump. He’s a dangerous sexist thug who shouldn’t be allowed  to take the White House tour let alone work there. And that’s why Corey Lewandoski is malaka of the week.

One thought on “Malaka Of The Week: Corey Lewandowski

  1. It’s telling to me that Lewandowski called up BuzzFeed to dispute the facts of its report, but never quite got around to identifying which facts were allegedly wrong. Knowing how sue-happy Trump is (at least to the extent that he likes to threaten lawsuits, but doesn’t seem to file nearly as many as he threatens), I’m intrigued by the absence of lawsuit talk that accompanies Team Trump’s dispute about how much of a jerk the campaign manager is.

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