It’s A Tu B’shevat Miracle!

Jewish Space Laser

Oy such a punum!

Space lasers. Oh dear god, I’m having to talk about space lasers. Jewish space lasers at that.

Sigh.

The Rothschilds, George Soros, billionaire Jewish bankers. Well when the going gets tough for the loony right why not fall back on some old tried and true tropes. Must admit the space lasers is a new twist though. Marjorie Taylor Greene, or as I’ve been calling her Queen Qitch (#QueenQitch), says space lasers were used to start the 2018 Camp Fire in Butte County California. According to her, the fire was set to make way for a bullet train from LA to Sacramento. Unfortunately her grasp of geography is as lax as her grasp of sanity. Butte County is north of Sacramento. Los Angeles is south. No rail corridors were harmed in the making of that fire. Just the most conservative QAnon loving part of the state.

Read between the lines of that particular conspiracy trope and you delve into why conspiracy theories can take hold.

Butte County is rural, 82% white, overwhelmingly evangelical Christian, a median income of $25K a year (as opposed to the California median of $80K), and the two largest employers are the State University at Chico, renown in story and song as the number one party school in the US, and the county healthcare system, both requiring education higher than a high school diploma for employment. It’s one of those counties where unless you’re in school at CSU Chico or attending a party there is really no reason to go there. Butte county hears about California’s economic boom as a rumor, but it hasn’t affected them.

That starts the grumble.

Among many other so-called “liberal causes” Californians whole heartedly have accepted the concept of climate change. We are doing everything an individual state can do to handle a global problem, but that chafes those who feel they are more involved and in tune with the natural environment (rural folks). They see us city slickers as trespassers on their turf, forcing an already economically deprived area into spending on carbon capture technology, improved fuel efficiency, and emission reduction, all in the name of something they don’t believe is real because it’s not in the Farmer’s Almanac.

The grumble feeds and grows stronger.

So when a giant fire destroys a good swath of their land, totally decimating a town ironically called Paradise, they can’t believe that climate change had any part in it. Now yes, the actual spark for the fire came from antiquated power lines owned by Pacific Gas and Electric, but what made what should have been a small wildfire into the largest fire in a century was that the land that spark fell onto had been parched by a six-year drought and a pathetically stupid refusal on the county’s part to engage in forest management or allow the state or federal government to do so. “We don’t know why that fire got so bad but it can’t be our fault”, say the good white citizens of Butte.

The grumble becomes a shout.

Then along comes someone who says “You’re right, it’s not your fault. It’s the fault of a space laser built by the International Jewish Conspiracy”. Those of us who believe in reality try to patiently explain the more complicated reasons for the fire. No, they scream back, we want the easy answer, the sound bite answer, the one that jives with our preconceived notions of the world. Besides the pretty blonde woman with the gun and the big taters says it’s so.

Substitute any of the outrageous lies that have emanated from the sickness that is QAnon but it’s always the same result. The gullible, the undereducated, the guys sitting at home because COVID shut down their workplace, all the shut-ins (incel or not) looking for community and a sense of belonging, they glom onto these quick and easy notions so they can feel better about their own lack of success in life. They stoke each others’ rantings, ginning up the ante bit by bit till at last the basement of a pizza parlor in D.C. is the central headquarters for a global conspiracy involving pedophilia, the Democratic party, and communist world domination. And Jews, don’t forget the Jews.

I would have thought that by now blaming Jews for anything had gone out of style. But then again I would have thought that teaching history would have cured the goyim of that. Instead a recent study found that 63% of Americans under the age of 40 don’t know even the most basic facts about the Holocaust. Hell, 11% of those in the survey think Jews CAUSED the Holocaust. Speaking of Hell, Sheldon Adelson maybe you could have spent some of that money you gave Republicans on basic world history classes for high schools.

It appears Never Again is being replaced with Why Not Again?

I should point out that the space laser commotion came to light on Tu B’shevat which is the Jewish festival celebrating humans connection to the natural environment. Kind of an Arbor Day for the Chosen People. And they say god has no sense of humor.

Shapiro Out

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5 thoughts on “It’s A Tu B’shevat Miracle!

  1. Owen says:

    Is it just me who wants this to really be true. Space lasers would be so great. And the US Space Force would finally get a mission!

  2. kwark says:

    And Butte County is one of the rural counties in California that wants to secede from California and create the Great State of Jefferson. ‘Course they won’t be able to maintain their roads or afford police and fire services but those items are creeping Socialism anyway and freedum is priceless.

  3. Is it me or does Jewish Space lasers have the sound of something from Austin Powers?

  4. GummoMarx says:

    Unfortunately, the idea that Q followers are poor and ignorant has been refuted again and again. The traitors who stormed the Capitol and are slowly but surely being arrested keep turning out to be business owners, middle class and with enough leisure time and money to buy expensive military-grade weapons and take an insurrection “vacation”.

    It’s comforting to think that the Q people and their allies are poor & ignorant and thus ultimately harmless, but it just isn’t so.

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