What Do They Think Goes On in Girls’ Bathrooms?

Via Shakesville, this entire story is worth a read, but this type of thing kept jumping out at me in places:

When fifth grade started, Wyatt was gone. Nicole showed up for school, sometimes wearing a dress and sporting shoulder-length hair. She began using the girls’ bathroom. Nikki’s friends didn’t have a problem with the transformation; there were playdates and sleepovers.

“They said, ‘It was about time!’ ‘ Nicole says. She was elected vice president of her class and excelled academically.

But one day a boy called her a “faggot,’ objected to her using the girls’ bathroom, and reported the matter to his grandfather, who is his legal guardian. The grandfather complained to the Orono School Committee, with the Christian Civic League of Maine backing him. The superintendent of schools then decided Nicole should use a staff bathroom.


Last winter, Maine state representative Kenneth Fredette, a Republican from Penobscot County, sponsored a bill that would have repealed protections for transgender people in public restrooms, instead allowing schools and businesses to adopt their own policies. The bill was a response to the Maines’ 2009 lawsuit against the Orono School District.

It keeps coming back to bathrooms, and thus the conflation of “transgender” with “sexual predator.” But I just have to ask what exactly Republicans envision when they think of a ladies’ room?

Every girls’ bathroom I’ve ever been in has either been a one-room thing with a lock on the door, meaning you go in and only people you allow in are in there with you, or it’s got individual locking stalls so that you’re not, like, looking at people peeing or anything. Outside the stalls we often do secret sexy things like wash our hands and put on lipstick, things many women do in the presence of a penis on a regular basis without the world fucking ending. So what is the deal? What is going to happen that is some kind of violation?

Yes, in men’s rooms there are urinals, but I have yet to see a horrible panic in Congress about female to male transgender folks invading the guys’ shitter. It’s always the poor helpless chickadees who need protection from the presence of a Seekrit Dude. And if peen is the issue, where is the worry about women who bring their 12-year-old boys in there with them because Junior can’t be out of mommy’s sight for ten seconds, not even to pee? That makes me far more uncomfortable than wondering what kind of equipment the woman the next stall over was born with.

Is this some kind of fixation you get from watching too much repressive porn, or something? Where you think it’s a nonstop lesbian orgy in there, or it’s some kind of secret world where we’re all taking off our bras and dancing to Enya? I’m not in a public bathroom for a second longer than I have to be, because a) gross, almost always and b) better things to do. It’s not a hangout.

Unless you’re a family-values conservative trolling for some airport beejers, I guess.


13 thoughts on “What Do They Think Goes On in Girls’ Bathrooms?

  1. herodotus says:

    What a beautiful, compassionate family. And so so brave. Too bad haters gotta hate.
    In my schools growing up, all the way through high school, there were NO DOORS on any of the restroom stalls, for both boys and girls. How embarrassing! I guess the adults in charge thought we’d all use drugs in there or something. I grew up in middle-class suburban Iowa and graduated high school in 1996. Luckily, I lived right across the street from my high school, so if I needed to use the bathroom, I’d just go home and then skip the rest of the day.
    Ya know, I wouldn’t care if all restrooms were unisex, but I don’t think women would care for that very much, considering how absolutely disgusting men’s restrooms are. Learning how to lift the lid and aim are skills boys should be taught at an early age.

  2. mass says:

    They are thinking about what goes on in girls’ restrooms.
    That would be the problem.

  3. mellowjohn says:

    i’m so old i remember hysteria over UNISEX BATHROOMS ZOMG!!!!! helping to scuttle the equal rights amendment.

  4. Elspeth Ravenwind says:

    “…it’s some kind of secret world where we’re all taking off our bras and dancing to Enya?” Aww hell, ya caught me! 😉
    And yet again, Athenae wins the Interwebz!!! 🙂
    Between what the ‘clutch the pearls’ conservatards imagine (and spend WAY TOO MUCH TIME DOING SO) going on in there and womens dressing rooms (like the ones at open door (accessibility) Macy’s) – they need to have some serious therapy sessions.
    They aren’t outraged at the goings-on in Sandusky’s locker room, where he inappropriately showered w/young boys and even worse…nope, nothing to see there – if it’s peen on peen in the bastion of a sports-type-thang, s’okay – doesn’t matter to them EVEN IF it’s a minor being molested.

  5. Elspeth Ravenwind says:

    Herodotus – I spent a Christmas shopping season (back in 97) working retail at “Restoration Hardware” – fairly upscale if not full out… Usually, I’d be the last to the closing chores list and I’d get bathroom cleaning duty. I was actually shocked – the ladies room was always a disaster compared to the mens…!??! Nasty. Not that the mens was antiseptic, but generally in better shape. I know there are men who toilet themselves cleanly – thankfully I am in love w/one of them. So my childhood hellish memories of having to clean the bathroom I shared w/my little brother are fading fast.

  6. Dorothy says:

    Wait, so a boy who called her a faggot is the one who objected to her using the girl’s bathroom?
    But none of the girls objected?
    I can only see two ways to make sense of this:
    1) “Hey! If she uses the girl’s bathroom, I can’t beat her up at lunchtime!” (Parent’s response: “How DARE this faggot have a safe haven where she can be protected from torturing bullies like my precious darling who is only trying to keep the faggot from going to hell, like good Christians should?”)
    2) “Hm…I wonder…if I dress like a girl, can I sneak into the can sneak into the girl’s bathroom, too? I might be able to get a peek at some boobs!” (Parent’s response: “Eeek! He wants to wear women’s clothes!The very existence of that faggot is turning my son gaaaaaaaay!”)

  7. Jo says:

    “Nikki’s friends didn’t have a problem with the transformation; there were playdates and sleepovers.”
    So the girls didn’t mind even having sleepover’s with “Nikki” so unless “Nikki” was incredibly hung and the girls were sexually precocious little vixens I’d say there wasn’t much to be jealous of, but I can see some weasel-eyed little virgin punk slinking around and spreading filth where none existed just because he was jealous.

  8. Geeno says:

    Well that picture shows that both kids got good genes. She’s adorable, and he is going to cut quite the dashing figure in another year or two.
    I have to say it’s good that she’s the strong personality. She’ll need it.

  9. Tom Allen says:

    Well, what they thought went on in boys’ bathrooms was bullying, smoking, and gay blow jobs. I was afraid of the first and secretly hoped for the other two. I guess I always assumed it was the same for the girls. At least the popular ones.
    And for the record, yes, guys do occasionally fight, do drugs, or give blow jobs in men’s rooms when they grow up. I have done all three, not that I’m particularly proud or ashamed of it. Thing is, it’s a lot less scary and a lot more cheesy than these people’s fevered imaginations make it. Get a life, a-holes. 😛

  10. pansypoo says:

    porkies level maturation ya’ll.
    our overlords are idiots.

  11. Tom Allen says:

    Oh, you just figured that out, pansypoo? Haven’t you watched Porky’s? Guys don’t mature, they just get older.
    That’s why we need to insist on rules to keep the overlords in check. Otherwise …

  12. OkieBlue says:

    But, but Tom Couburn says girls are having teh crazy lesbian sex in the girls’ bathrooms. You can’t have a boy in there with all that lesbian love going on.
    Wait a minute, he wouldn’t lie about this would he?

  13. escariot says:

    I love this place. Yeas, the Enya phrase is a classic. And what sad statement of the things in Maine that all this kerfuffle over some “get off my lawn” guardian having a problem with his grandson having to be in the same building where someone was being treated decently by hiss peers. That is some majorly fucked up.

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